First off, many thanks and blessings to everyone and their kind words, hugs and thoughts. I am so thankful for the support shown from friends near and far, known and getting to be known. Seriously, there are no words to express my gratitude.
The past week has been what one would call an 'emotional rollercoaster'. It was to be expected and will continue for an unknown length of time, I'm sure. I have never been in the situation of losing such a close friend so wasn't quite sure how I was going to deal with the loss. I decided that I would just go with it. Cry when I needed to cry, smile when I felt I could smile, and talk to Tigger a lot. I know she can hear me wherever she is, so I've been rambling on to her a ton. I'm sure she is thinking 'holy hannah, even where I am she STILL rambles on!'
As with triathlon, no matter what happens in life one must continue with foreward movement. So that's what I've been doing - moving forward even when I felt like I just wanted to stand still and be sad.
I got a good ride on the bike (albeit I was in the trainer) for 3 hours last Sunday. I have mine and Tiggers finish line photo up beside my bike so I could ask her for strength now and then. I felt really strong on the bike for the most part, but the last hour was a bit tough. I got through it with flying colours though!
All the work I've been getting done on my hip seems to be helping. I have gotten a couple half hour runs in and an hour run. I still feel like the hip is a bit unstable, but it doesn't hurt as much. There may still be hope that I'll do the Policeman's Half Marathon at the end of the month!! I'm going to keep a good eye on my hip and make a decision closer to the date.
As for swimming, holy hannah the posture stuff I've been doing seems to have paid off! Granted I haven't actually timed myself, but I feel like I'm realling pulling through the water now. I love it! It's happening right from the start of my swim too, I haven't had to build up to it. Of course I'm still being watched like a hawk by the lifeguard... Perhaps she has an aversion to really nice people who happen to have tattoos and swims with a Jolly Roger on their swim cap??? My punch card only has ONE punch left in it....oh oooooooh. This time I will be sure to get another card BEFORE it expires.
I've been doing the physio, accupuncture thing for my broken arse and legs. As they have been helping I figured I'd go back to getting massage. There is a massage therapist, Pat, in town who is brilliant with a capital B. For some reason I hadn't been in a couple of years, but decided he was the man for the job.
Let's just say that he found every line of pain there was in my glutes and quads. Ow, ow, ow. My main focus was to keep breathing. At one point Pat said, in his always soothing voice, 'Just breath Susi'. Riiiiight. It feels as though you are slicing a knife thorugh my legs, but I'll just keep breathing here... I gotta say though, as soon as he was done I could tell things were more loose. I have a feeling I can now run faster and jump tall buildings in a single bound!
So that's been my week. Tigger is always on my mind. She gives me strength. I am slowly healing, as we all are. In August, I will race Ironman Canada in her honour. I knew I was going to do this even before she passed away. I bought a wee Tigger stuffie and will carry it with me for the entire race. Not that I need to carry Tigger because I know she is going to be with me every stroke, pedal and step. I will remember how she talked to EVERYONE on the course and kept them going. I will remember her infectious 1000 watt smile and how she would tell me 'You just gotta do it!' It's going to be an amazing race - I promise you that.
Peace out my wonderful friends - thank you again for everything.
Parental unit thinks this is some of your best writing as it comes from the heart. Happy to see your body is also healing.
ReplyDeleteI actually named my bike after my mom that passed. I had a decal made for the fork that says Sue. Everyone always thinks it's my name and I just tell them it's my mom's name. She pulls me through when I'm tired, when I don't wanna and when I'm broken! Hang tough. The only thing I CAN tell you is that time is a big healer.
ReplyDeleteOne of the best things I've ever read about dealing with tough situations was actually in a fiction book. "You just go on. There's no trick to it. There's no magic. You just go on till you're out the other side."
ReplyDeleteWhen you get an attack of life, there are two responses. You can roll over and give up. You get up and carry on as best you can. You're doing the second, and you'll be just fine.
I have lived through it,I took care of my Mom in her final days. As hard as it is, it does get easier,,,although I still have my meltdowns from time to time.It is important to never forget,,& cherish all the time you spent together.They are always with ya ,,,no matter what. Remember that!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this with us Susi -- your honesty and openness amazes and inspires me.
ReplyDeleteYou are in my prayers, my friend.